General Motors to Recall Every Car Ever Made…by Any Automaker

General Motors (ticker GM) has announced that it will recall every car and truck in the United States ever made…by any automaker.  The company recalled 2.6 million cars in February because of faulty ignition switches.  In all, the company has recalled a New-Coke-ish 29 million cars in North America this year.  Said CEO Mary “No such thing as bad publicity” Barra, who drives a Lexus, “If you drive a car or truck of any make or model, it’s officially been recalled today.  Whatever’s wrong with it is probably GM’s fault.  Get off the road before it’s too late.”  Barra, who began her career at GM as a college intern in 1980 but amazingly claims that she only learned of the ignition switch problem in December 2013, kindly opted not to attend her daily Liars Anonymous meeting in order to speak with Bud Fox News. Continue reading