Separated at Birth: FIFA Scoundrel Chuck Blazer and UVa Professor R. Edward Freeman

Posted on June 4, 2015 by Canada Bill Jones

Was Chuck Blazer, shown here giving a thumbs up to corruption with FIFA President Sepp Blatter, leading a double life… (Photo: Frank May/European Pressphoto Agency)

University of Virginia Darden School of Business MBA Program

…as Professor R. Edward Freeman of UVa’s Darden School of Business? (Photo: http://www.darden.virginia.edu/)

Question: Has thoroughly unscrupulous former FIFA executive committee member/bribe-taker/wire-wearer Chuck Blazer been leading an ironic double life as the erudite R. Edward Freeman, Professor at UVa’s Darden School of Business, author of the definitive and award-winning Strategic Management: A Stakeholder Approach, and, of all things, Academic Director of the Business Roundtable Institute for Corporate Ethics?

Continue reading →

Chris Christie to Enter Nathan’s Annual July 4th Hot Dog Eating Contest

Posted on June 1, 2015 by Canada Bill Jones

This July 4th, Joey Chestnut will look to win a mind- and stomach-blowing 9th consecutive “Mustard Belt,” but… (Photo: Monika Graff/Getty Images)

…upstart Chris Christie can’t be taken lightly. (Photo: http://www.pennpoliticalreview.org)

He is known for having a big mouth. He appears to be suffering the consequences of an even bigger appetite. And in the face of personal all-time low approval ratings and his state’s nine credit rating downgrades, his presidential aspirations seem the biggest of pipe dreams. In what can only be viewed as a desperate bid for non-Bridgegate-related media attention while trying to stay relevant in the Republican presidential primary conversation, the New Jersey Governor, known back in his early teen years as “Chicken Bone” Christie for how quickly he could gnaw down a chicken bone to nothing more than a splinter, has announced that he will participate in the annual Nathan’s Hot Dog Eating Contest, held every July 4th on Coney Island, NY. Last year, Joey Chestnut, indisputably the Lebron James of the competitive eating circuit, ate 61 dogs in 10 minutes to win the Mustard Belt for the eighth consecutive year. If Christie or legitimate challenger Matt “Megatoad” Stonie, who played Mantle to Chestnut’s Maris last year by ingesting 56 dogs in a battle royal that competitive eating fans still haven’t stopped analyzing, can’t beat him this summer, then Chestnut will have collected a whopping nine Mustard Belts, a herculean achievement certainly comparable (or perhaps superior given the individual nature of Chestnut’s potential exploit) to the nine World Series rings Joe DiMaggio won with the New York Yankees.

Anthony Cacciatore, 47, of Bayonne, NJ, who recently attended a Republican fundraiser where he saw Christie in action, thinks the governor has a good shot at taking down Chestnut: Continue reading →

Obama Orders Coast Guard to Fight Climate Change with Ice Cube Drops

Posted on May 26, 2015 by Canada Bill Jones

Step gingerly, Mr. President, the ground beneath you is afire from “climate change.” (Photo: Kevin Lamarque/Reuters)

In the face of almost two decades of flat global temperatures, President Obama was smart enough to invoke “climate change” instead of “global warming” at his commencement speech at the Coast Guard Academy last week. But that’s where his cerebral activity came to a screeching halt. Yes, indeed, the man who exhibited the solipsism of a Kardashian when he told an infatuated electorate and media on election night 2008 that people would look back on his victory as the moment “when the rise of the oceans began to slow and our planet began to heal; this was the moment when we ended a war…,” told the cadets that climate change, yes- that’s right, would be one of their nastiest enemies:

And this brings me to the challenge I want to focus on today — one where our Coast Guardsmen are already on the front lines, and that, perhaps more than any other, will shape your entire careers — and that’s the urgent need to combat and adapt to climate change.

Continue reading →

In Honor of Memorial Day: Obama’s “Coffee Cup Salute”

Posted on May 25, 2015 by Canada Bill Jones

Bud Fox News wishes all our readers a happy Memorial Day. Here’s a bit of reading on the history of the holiday. As we remember those who have died in the service of our country, let’s also not forget our current Commander in Chief’s inimitable “Coffee Cup Salute.” If only all of us could stroll about so insouciantly, then ulcers, tension headaches, and high blood pressure would be obsolete. Sashaying away like the bizarre love child of a failed fashion model and Greek mythology’s Narcissus, the President has earned at least a cameo in Zoolander 2. But on a more serious note, it’s reasonable to ask how much longer we will even remember our slain heroes if we continue to elect leaders so clearly disdainful of our military.

From the Loony Bin: The Race Gets More Interesting, Etc…

Posted on May 19, 2015 by Canada Bill Jones

“Martin, you’re starting to look better than my wife.” (AP Photo/Brennan Linsley, File)

Bud’s Round-Up of Daily Drivel:

Democrat Martin O’Malley: Bill Clinton once predicted he’d “go all the way.” (Philly.com)
Big mistake: Airbag defect now the largest auto recall of all time. (CNN)
Under Armour under pressure: Company pulls t-shirt designed in style of iconic Iwo Jima photo. (Marine Corps Times)
Carl Icahn likes Apple: Septuagenarian investor thinks the stock is worth $240. (USA Today)
“I ain’t sayin’ she a gold digger”: 91-year-old Sumner Redstone’s 43-year-old “girlfriend” visualizes her payday. (NY Post)
Not Econ 101: LA City Council votes to increase minimum wage to $15. (Bloomberg)
Liar, liar, pantsuit on fire: Hillary Clinton’s non-existent credibility takes hits over Benghazi and her second secret email address. (PowerLine and Breitbart)
Barack Obama and his Syrian red line: The revisionist history starts before his administration even ends. (PowerLine)
Desperately trying to stay relevant: Chris Christie flip-flops on immigration. (NJ.com)
The Sharpton apple doesn’t fall far from the tree: The Rev’s daughter sees her laughable lawsuit start to fall apart. (Free Beacon)
NFL PAT: The point-after just got more difficult. (Sporting News)

“Agnostic”: Bankerspeak Gone Wrong- Father O’Callahan vs The Portfolio Manager

Posted on May 14, 2015 by Canada Bill Jones

Bud Fox News has a mole at a large money management firm. More stealthy than your typical SAC analyst/insider-trader, he was able to film, in sub rosa fashion, his portfolio manager boss when he sat down with Father O’Callahan to review the local Catholic Church’s investment portfolio. In a moment of refreshing honesty, the PM confesses to the holy man that he hornswoggles most of his customers. The world-weary O’Callahan is unfazed by the PM’s avarice, patiently absolves him of his sins, and then teaches him a lesson about Satan’s return and the confusing nature of bankerspeak. Enjoy:

Hillary Clinton Declares Open Season on the Truth

Posted on May 7, 2015 by Canada Bill Jones

Warning: You are now entering the Clinton Zone, to protect yourself from flying bullshit, please put on your safety goggles. (Photo: Photo: Alex Wong/Getty Images)

In remarks Tuesday that proved convincingly that “The Truth” is not her middle name, Hillary Clinton sent a clear message to those who might try to deny her the Presidency: She will make up “facts” out of thin air to animate her stillborn message of predictable Clintonian nostrums that run 40 years past their sell-by date.

At a “round table” discussion at Rancho High School in Las Vegas, with her eyes rolling around like a slot machine of pure ambition and her neck craning back and forth like some sort of patronizing, political ostrich, Clinton, as charismatic as a cockroach and so unnatural a speaker (and probably so unsure of her point) that she kept referring to pages on the table in front of her despite her simplistic subject matter, sounded and looked like a schizophrenic mental patient who was tickled pink to be speaking English for the first time (see video below if you can stomach it). She unleashed the following canard while trying to convince the Elizabeth Warren faction of her party that she’s to the left of the world on immigration:

“…our undocumented workers in New York pay more in taxes than some of our biggest corporations in New York.”

Continue reading →

From the Loony Bin: Janet Yellen and Her Big Mouth, Etc…

Posted on May 5, 2015 by Canada Bill Jones

Federal Reserve’s Janet Yellen:

…I tawt I leaked an intwest wate!

Bud’s round-up of Daily Drivel:

Fed Head or Blockhead? Federal Reserve chair Yellen admits that she met with firm that leaked Fed info. (Reuters)
What the Huck? Mike Huckabee is running for president. (Yahoo)
Mother Fracker: Greenlight’s David Einhorn denounces US frackers as money losers at the Sohn Investment Conference. (Fortune)
Lies, damned lies, and statistics: A jaundiced view of this Friday’s jobs report. (NY Post)
Where’s the beef? Investors are not impressed with McDonald’s turnaround plans. (USA Today)
Bill-paying Bill: Hillary Clinton’s husband demonstrates that he probably won’t be much help on the campaign trail. (Breitbart)
Socialism 1, baseball 0: MLB talent scouts are pulling up stakes in Venezuela. (PowerLine)
¡Feliz Cinco de Mayo! That’s Spanish for “Have another Margarita.” Here’s why the US celebrates. (USA Today)

Al Sharpton Tapped as New IRS Commissioner

Posted on May 1, 2015 by Canada Bill Jones

Despite his occasional struggles with the English language (see video above), the Reverend Sharpton’s message to anyone planning on cutting corners with his or her Form 1040 will be quite clear: Pay up because I know all your dirty tricks!

In a magnificent move that nicely concludes yet another glorious tax season for the rapacious federal government, the Obama administration has tapped tax deadbeat, race hustler, and frequent White House visitor Al Sharpton as new IRS Commissioner, replacing John Koskinen, who was certainly one of the smuggest and most obnoxious federal bureaucrats in recent memory. Perched in fat-cat fashion, despite his trimmer frame of recent years, at the money-making intersection of race and religion, Sharpton will burnish the street-smart credentials of the Obama administration, typically home to incompetent, looks-good-on-paper types like Janet “Big Sis” Napolitano, whom the Rev could outfox blindfolded.

Asked for comment on the appointment, DeFred Goo Folts, Professor of Public Policy at the Newark (Delaware) State Normal School of Liberal Arts, Director of the Nixonian Institute for Governmental Ethics, and author of the superb, Pulitzer-nominated Sharpton bio The Reverend and the God Almighty…Dollar, told Bud Fox News: Continue reading →

From the Loony Bin: 1Q GDP up 0.2% on Annualized Basis, Etc…

Posted on April 29, 2015 by Canada Bill Jones

Bud’s Round-up of Daily Drivel:

0.2% “growth” vs an expected 1%: The Federal Reserve speaks after lackluster 1Q GDP number. (Reuters)
Ben Bernanke cashes in: First hedge fund Citadel hires him, now PIMCO. (WSJ)
Fusion and MKZ owners, beware: Ford recalls almost 600,000 North American vehicles. (Detroit Free Press)
An education in corruption: A university hired Bill Clinton while Hillary steered State Dept grants to its non-profit affiliate. (NY Post)
I confess: Javaris Crittenton, ex-NBA player, pleads guilty to manslaughter in shooting death and faces 23-year sentence. (ESPN)